Naqiyyah's Path of life

On last 17 May 2013, i have celebrated my husband's birthday. even it is a delay celebration due to the hectic schedule of an architecture final year student, it was awesome. he was sleeping when i wanted to pick the cake at ground floor as the baker sent me an sms telling me that she has arrived. i ordered red velvet with cream cheese frosting for his birthday. it was really delicious. i love to order the cake at Manis cake because it is delicious. i have once ordered the red velvet cake for my mom birthday last year. Ok, i will upload the photos later. busy studying for my final. pray for me;) Till then;)

Sometimes, i feel something really heavy fell on me when thinking about those past years that i have endured. Sometimes, i ask myself why those obstacles only been tested on me? why my others siblings have not been tested the same too? but later i found the relevant answers. Allah SWT loves me a lot. that is why he gave me those tests to make me stronger. to erase my sins. to multiply my good deeds. insyaAllah. But sometimes, when the thought struck in mind, i should have someone to talk to but it is better for me to write it here. my cyber diary. thanks.

Mulianya kamu, Memburukkan aku, Katamu terasa bebanmu, Untuk menceritakan perihalku.. Walau bertahun berlalu, Walau bertahun tak ketemu, Aku tetap di situ, Menanti sesuatu, Aku rasa kamu tahu, Aku bukan begitu, Tapi mengapa sesedap kamu, Memburukkan aku? Aku tahu perihalmu, Akan rasa cebisan cemburu, Sangat membelenggu, Agar aku tidak bersatu.. Mungkin kau mampu, Mengaburi mata itu, Namun semua tahu, Bagaimana perihalmu, Membuat semuanya bercelaru, Bertahun-tahun perkelahian itu, Tak mungkin aku, Lupakan itu.. Sampai kini, Semua belum henti, Kau ingat aku buta serta tuli? Semua ada dalam benak ini, Namun aku bukan seperti kamu sebentar tadi, Takkan aku taburi cerita basi, Sesedap hati, Kerana apa terjadi, Pasti ada balasannya nanti, Dan aku pasti, Suatu hari nanti, Kau termalu sendiri.. Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 1227pm, 29 May 2013

Usah berjanji jika ingin memungkiri, Usah menipu jika akan diketahui, Menyampah betul kali ini, Sudah-sudah angkat bakul sendiri.. Bukan sekali, Bukan dua kali, Sudah berkali-kali, Bila mahu henti? Nanti orang benci, Baru tergadah diri? Tak perlu menunjuk kaulah puteri, Tak perlu menaja kaulah malaikat duniawi, Jika sebenarnya sekadar mainan di sini.. Aku bosan dengan orang begini, Jika tidak mampu jangan berjanji, Jangan suatu masa nanti, Semua orang terasa hati, Sampai mati rasa sesal sendiri.. Aku bukan malaikat, Tapi aku beringat, Jangan terikat, Jika tak nak buat... Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 853pm, 28 May 2013

Lewat malam ini, Lewat aku tidurkan diri, Mungkin sebelah siang tadi, Telah lama aku beradukan diri.. Lewat bukan sia-sia, Lewat demi periksa, Aku korban masa, Aku korban rasa, Untuk dapat pertama.. Lewat aku penat, Peluh serta berkeringat, Panas dan hangat, Malam ini tak ingat.. Lewat aku ini, Semoga doa mengiringi, Semoga suami redhai, Perjalanan aku kali ini.. Lewat aku bersajak lagi, Lewat nanti sukar bangun pagi, Taknak lah subuh meninggi mentari, Maka aku ingin berhenti, Ingin kunoktahkan di sini. Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 117am, 26 May 2013

berat beban itu, berat tak tertanggung aku, berat tidak mampu, namun sedari aku, berdoalah aku, bermunajat padaMu.. sendu tangis ini, tidak berhenti jatuh merebah bumi, tidak berhenti basahi pipi, namun sedari sendiri, doa pada Ilahi, terasa ringan menyelimuti.. hidup nyawa mati pergi, semua ditangan Pencipta abadi, sedari aku kita di sini, bukanlah untuk mencari haqiqi, kerana di sanalah tempat kembali, yang kekal di sana menanti.. suami yang dikasihi, abah serta mama disayangi, abah dan umi dihormati, adik-beradik sendiri, adik beradik ipar diingati, rakan serta sahabat sejati, pendidik yang mendidik diri ini, sedarilah aku jika ada mengguris hati.. aku insan biasa, tidak bisa maksum dosa, namun harapku taubat diterima, sebelum menjengah ke alam sana... Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 1005pm, 24 May 2013

the only grandparent that i have now is my grandmother at my mom's side. unfortunately, she is now really sick. i just came back from Kuala Terengganu last night. she can't talk anymore. she can't move anymore. she had been paralyzed because of stroke. i am now at the point that diverged by two options. whether i want to stay a bit longer at Kuala Terengganu or going back to Kuala Lumpur as soon as possible. i chose to be back at here Kuala Lumpur as i have responsibility as a student. yes, indeed i am really worried about her condition but what can i do. i know the best thing that i can do now is keep on praying. ask Allah SWT to ease her sickness and make her as healthy as before. i love her. she has been always praying for me in order to achieve the best thing in this life and hereafter. p/s: please pray for her too dear friends. make Doa a lot;)

angin bayu menyapa, teringat suatu masa, berapa kali kucuba, masih tidak berdaya, masih gagal untuk berjaya.. angin lalu menari, apa itu diari? apa itu memori? semua terbawa mimpi.. aku bukan siapa-siapa, aku bukan keturunan raja, apa yang aku ada, cuma sedetik masa, yang pernah ada, dalam kamar setia.. tapi kini terasa beda, terpanggil rasa bisa, terlupa rasa tidak kena, apa yang aku kata, semua sia-sia.. apalah yang aku ada, secebis memori tua, sebongkah rasa, dari waktu muda.. Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 204am, 22 May 2013

Indah suatu mimpi, Namun realiti, Tidak seperti, Mimpi tadi.. Indah suatu mimpi, Namun realiti, Tidak seperti aku di sini, Menanti dan terus menanti, Seseorang untuk munculkan diri.. Indah suatu mimpi, Namun realiti, Tidak mampu aku berlari, Mengejar pelangi, Yang aku sukai... Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 1059pm, 12 May 2013

Seeing photographs at FB sometimes makes me feel sad. Seeing that they can afford to enjoying themselves with friends and family travelling makes me always goggling and searching for the best price of flight ticket to be bought. unfortunately, looking at the money left in the account makes me realize that the cloud nine is no where near to be reached by me. patience is what i have to digest right now and i think for another some times. ;( sad because i have been dreaming a lot of travelling after finishing my study. i have been waiting for quite several years. pitiful but it is the ugly truth for me to face!

rindu bertamu, terkenang dulu, tika dengar lagu, terukir di bulan yang selalu, aku dengar saat denganmu.. rindu akan masa itu, kamu hantar aku.. rindu kamu mahu, temani aku.. rindu saat itu, saat kita mahu, terikat jitu.. sayangku, aku mahu kamu tahu, aku rindu... Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 315pm, 12 May 2013

Bohong aku katakan, jika aku tidak fikirkan, akan suatu kenangan.. Bohong aku jika, kenangan itu tidak bermakna, tidak beri apa-apa yang istemewa.. Bohong aku nafi, suatu rasa di hati, yang dulu bersemi, untuk kamu di sanubari.. Bohong dan aku bohong, Bohong sekali bohong, Aku takkan bohong, Jika kamu yang selalu kulaung.. Bohong, Aku tak mampu, Hapus memori dulu, Dari membelenggu diriku... Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 153pm, 12 May 2013

Every married couple wants baby to cherish their lives. and same goes to us. Dear baby, Mummy is here. Please come as soon as possible. Mummy misses u so much. Ya Allah, Ease our ways to be parents who can take good care of our child;) Ya Allah, I love my husband.

So far, i have visited Langkawi 3 times and the latest one last week. we departed from Tanah Merah 9am on 1 May 2013 and reached Langkawi Island 715pm (Jetty Point Complex). Then we headed to Sri Lagenda Apartment. My husband and I were not sleeping in Sri Lagenda Apartment because there were my in law there. thus it will be nicer if we sleep at others place because the apartment unit was quite congested with many people. hence, we try to search the nearest accommodation near the apartment, because it got darken, thus we just checked in this one hotel. the Region hotel. Region Hotel We checked in Family room as the standard rooms were full. When we open the door there was cockroach crossed in front of us.*damn the toilet bowl was really dirty and has made me felt like ****** the mirror at the toilet was terrible. u can't see your image anymore. it's too old! the sink pipe leaks. ewwww! *serius geli gila! then next morning we checked out and went out to find other

Terkenang lautan itu, Lautan dosa dulu, Lautan dosa baru, Apa yang aku laku, Masihkah tersisa pahalaku? Ajal aku, Tak terjangkau mindaku, Bila tiba waktu, Adakah masih punya waktu, Untuk aku bergelar ibu? Dunia kian berakhir, Fitnah mengalir-ngalir, Derasnya bergilir-gilir, Tak termampu bibir, Mengucap tasbih dan takbir, Namun di hati bisa terukir.. Aku khuatir, Adakah hadir, Hari terakhir, Aku terpinggir, Atau masih dalam fikir.. Nasib insan, Dalam kehidupan, Pasti terbit harapan, Namun jua ada akhiran.. Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 1111pm, 9 May 2013

today is my hubby birthday. today he is 27th years old. my bambam is really cute. he is my everything. he gives me what others can't give. he means a lot to me. Happy 27th Birthday Dear;)

Bila tulisan menjadi lisan, lisan didengari insan, apa tersirat menjadi pandangan, apa terselindung menjadi bualan.. kalah menang adat pertandingan, tapi menang dalam kegelapan, apa makna ini semua barisan? kamu takut akan pakatan? aku tidak kaya harta, namun ilmu masih ada, walau kukira belum penuh di dada, mampu mentafsir yang jelas dan nyata.. semalam aku terlena, dibuai mimpi sehingga terjaga, tatkala aku terjaga, aku terfikir adakah kamu merasa yang sama? dapatkah bermimpi kisah bahagia, atau mimpi ngeri mengundang duka? adil serta saksama, tuntutan agama Pencipta kita, jangan pernah lupa, Allah SWT ada, di sini kita, bukan selamanya, jika esok lusa tiada, bekalan yang mana, bakal menolong kita? aku bukan sengaja, menulis untuk mendapat puja, namun hati merintih duka, rasuah bermaharajalela, aku tak sanggup terima.. Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 806am, 8 May 2013

Detik berlalu meninggal mimpi, kini mimpi bertukar realiti, kamu selamat menjadi suami, yang setiap hari, aku rindui.. Wahai suami yang berganjak usia, harapan aku semakin mekar membara, agar usia pernikahan kita, berkekalan sehingga akhir nyawa, seterusnya sampai ke syurga.. Wahai suami yang berganjak umur, jangan lupa menegur, isterimu yang tak cukup umur, hahaha nanti bulan beransur, pasti kita sama umur, eh silap pasti kamu lebih berumur, tika aku cukup umur... Wahai suami yang aku hormati, bimbinglah aku berhemah dihati, pimpinlah tanganku jika tersungkur ditepi, gerakkan aku tika subuh mewangi.. Wahai suamiku, selamat panjang umurmu, aku harap kamu rindu, aku yang selalu tahu, kamu sedang fikir akan aku;) Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 958pm, 7 May 2013

15 tahun dulu, aku dalam duniaku, sibuk belajar demi UPSRku, ada satu malam itu, terkejut beruk aku, dengan suatu berita palsu.. timbalan perdana menteri letak jawatan? lepas habis baris itu aku berkaparan, aku silap dengar atau aku dalam khayalan, Timbalan sudah jadi bekas timbalan? Esoknya, semua akhbar sibuk jaja berita, seks luar tabii penuh setiap dada, akhbar laku tak perlu dikata, aku tanya abah liwat tu apa? abah tak tahu nak jawab macam mana.. pada suatu usia, pada aku terlalu muda, aku disogok berita, yang jelik aku kira.. diusung ke penjara, seorang yang menabur jasa, dipukul tanpa belas rasa, meninggal isteri serta anak tercinta, pada suatu jangka masa, 6 tahun kukira, menderita tanpa dosa, yang dicanang sepelosok dunia.. aku tidak alpa, aku tidak akan pernah lupa, apa yang dia terima, tika saat hiba, dihina oleh jelata, tanpa diberi ruang masa, untuk diri dibela seadilnya.. wahai rakyat malaysia, sudah matang semuanya, dari remaj

i went back to hometown by bus this time. i love Sani's Express because they give the best service that one can get. the seats are huge, my leg can rest with all my heart with extra spaces. usually i will ensure that i buy the single seat instead of double seat if i'm alone. this is to ensure my comfort-ability and also my security. but unfortunately, last night i need to use Transnasional service. what i can say is they are totally out of my pleasure. they tend to make the bus passengers like sardine. my seat was upstair (skyview as mention in the ticket). the comfortable level that i usually get when using Sani's Express service is no where near to what i got last night. Transnasional seats are really small. the legs spaces are ridiculous for the person who own long legs as i am.wakakakaka. when the bus was at it turn for paying toll at Gombak Toll i did ask the driver to drop me at the roadside however he replied he can't but if u give me rm300 he can do it b

Bangun pagi, gosok gigi, pergi mandi, keluar mengundi, dihantar suami, semua pertama kali, along, amir dan ida ada sekali.. saluran empat kami mengundi, cukup panas sekali, panjang deretan sejam berdiri, tapi kami teguhkan hati, akhirnya kami dapat mengundi.. pertama kali pergi mengundi, semangat berkobar membakar hati, doa sentiasa mengiringi, agar syaitan tak hasut kanan kiri.. undi itu adalah rahsia, tak perlu canang merata, yang penting kita undi siapa, yang berkenan di jiwa.. suami tanya pangkah yang mana, sampai kini dia tak tahu siapa, sudah  dikata undi rahsia, biarlah rahsia selamanya.. Nukilan: Wan Naqiyyah Wan Hassan, 1149pm, 5 May 2013

5 May 2013 today the feeling is quite differ. my husband sends me and my siblings to Sekolah Kebangsaan Kubang Ikan then he drives back to his hometown to do his part. i have done my part. Along, Amir, Ida did the same. i wish for the best;) i want a better nation. what is left? Prayer. Keep praying for the best. Allah SWT knows better than us;) Along, Amir, Ida and me.

i visited Langkawi after 13 years. Cabel car is awesome. my husband quite panic and try to calm down by hold me tight. HEHEHEHE it was really awesome to be there with loves;)